Relaxed Hair Care Relaxed Hair Journey

Healthy Hair Journey on a Mental Note - Sdestra Progress chart - 2009

We sometimes fail to realize that a lot of the women and men who have been and are on a healthy hair journey had put in time and work to make it a successful one.  Many did their research, saw what worked for them, experimented, had patience and set realistic goals.  Also, there are many who want that “ideal hair” instantly without giving any thought of the effort that should be brought forth.  A hair journey is not just about buying hair products and using them.  A healthy hair journey is ultimately about you being prepared and staying optimistic throughout, no matter what happens during.

* Embrace what you have and work with it – your hair that is.

Hoping for your hair to look a certain way because you are using the same products someone is using may not give you the same results.  Your hair may be different and the products may not work well for you.   I have noticed individuals who expressed their disappointments on some hair boards, not letting go of the fact that their hair is not what they dreamed it would be.   Remember that all hair is beautiful as long as you embrace it, take care of it and feel confident with it…it is yours.  There is beauty in everything; it just needs to be enhanced to stand out more.

* Set short and long term hair goals for your hair journey.

Be realistic.  If your goal is to have waist length (WL) hair in 2 years, than that is a long term goal.  Within that long term goal, there should be short term goals implemented.  Those goals may be: improving the health of your hair, having staple products that compliment your hair and reaching certain hair lengths a step at a time, APL, BSL, MBL, WL.  Follow those who are on a hair journey within the scope of your short term goal.  Example, if you have a short term goal set for yourself to be arm pit length (APL) in 4 months and you are currently shoulder length (SL), follow those who are close to being APL or reached APL.  That part of their hair journey is recent and you have the ability to access the information close to your own goal.

* Help yourself first and do your own research.

Questions about a product to someone whose hair journey you are following can be easily looked up with the time you sent the message.   Remember this, not everything works for everyone.  It is easier to start your research on products first before asking someone about it.  That way, you are already armed with the info you have to see how it corresponds to the response you get.  This in turn may help you do something differently to make it work for you or dismiss it altogether.

* Use your regimen as a guide, don’t let it guide you.

Your regimen will change over time.  You may have to tweak it for it to become effective for you as you progress along.  At times, a product can be added, remove and replace products.  A weekly schedule is great to guide you during your journey.  If you are beating yourself up because you did not wash your hair during your wash day, missed one day of moisturizing out the seven days you usually do,

* Be patient during your hair journey.

We know that 99% of things do not happen overnight.  You may have set goals for your hair as far as what length you want to reach or how you want your hair to look.  How about making your hair look its best as you go along your hair journey?  As time goes by, you can handle your hair for that moment, not what you are hoping for it to be when you reach the desired goal.  You’ll be surprised with what you come up with as your creativity comes into play.

* A hair journey is what it is, it may not be perfect but learn from it.

If someone had a perfect hair journey, they are the few lucky individuals.  Life itself is a journey because you learn as you grow.  You make mistakes, come face to face with dilemmas and have to make some changes.  During your hair journey, you may reach the time where you experience a setback(s); which to some may be “depressing”.  Take notes, learn and move on to the next step.

* Worry about the health of your hair and the rest will follow.

A healthy head of hair will always turn heads at any length.  When you see a beautiful and healthy head of hair at any length, it causes you to stop in your tracks.  When the hair is healthy, it makes it easier to go through the hair journey as you are patiently waiting to reach your ultimate goal.

* Take care of your insides for it to reflect on the outside.

Proper diets, vitamins and exercise are also important when it comes to your body’s health.  Exercising promotes blood circulation and eating the right types of food provide your body the nutrients and vitamins it needs.  Taking vitamin supplements brings it to the right amounts your body needs.  Drink water, water, water!  Water is important because not only does it help quench thirst, it also “cleans” your insides.  Before exercising or starting a diet, please consult with your health care provider.

So now, are you ready to learn or ready to be disappointed during your healthy hair journey?

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About the author

thirsty roots®

Our goal is to share the beauty of Afro-textured hair and to have a place where we can come together to get examples, advice, and information of black hair growth and hairstyles. Whether you have permed, pressed, or natural hair it's still black hair and it's beautiful.


  • Don’t leave out good genetics, some people are born with a growing head of hair!!

  • I believe that everyone’s hair grows unless they have a serious medical condition that may affect that. The issue is that many people don’t retain what they grew or there is a lack of proper care. It doesn’t necessarily have to do with genetics. Everyone has good genes, which makes us all unique in different ways. Thank you so much for reading and commenting! God bless!

  • Hi Sdestra,

    I just saw your journey pics and you had a ton of growth back in 2008. It looks almost as though you had 4-5 inches of new growth in two month increments. Please send me a link to your journey from the beginning and the things you used to grow your hair. I often hear that the key is to delay relaxing. Please advise, as I do not have the kind of hair that will go very long, much less 12-18 weeks without one.


  • Hi Calili!

    The link to my hair regimen can be found on my blog at My hair actually grows a little slower than the average of 6 inches per year (1/2 an inch per month). There may have been a gap in my photos or maybe I had mislabeled them. I do apologize and do not want to decieve anyone with my hair journey. Delaying the time you relax which is called “stretching” is one of the ways to maintain healthy relaxed hair. Also proper techniques, moisturizing the ends and low manipulation. If you have any questions, you can leave them on my blog, email me at And you do have the kind of hair that grows…everyone does. It is a matter of finding the things to help it flourish 🙂

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